Our DNA story part 2 : Meeting in Person
If you have not read Part 1 of our DNA story then check it out here. I recount all the preamble leading to this part of the story. If you are looking for a DNA story of your own check out Ancestry for your kit. This weekend has been wonderful, and yet, filled with regret for the missed opportunities. A weekend of trying to get to know what was missed during the lifetime we were unaware of Mr.Jones’ existence. The sad thing is that there is no way to make up for what has been missed. However, we did our best.
The Long-Awaited Meeting
Mr. Jones and his wife came to meet us, with a quick meet and greet as my husband called it. Mr. Jones and his wife arrived Late on Saturday night and my husband picked up his Dad( Mr. Sir) and waited in the lobby of the Hotel Mr. Jones had made reservations at. Even though I was not in attendance I can truly attest to the excitement and anticipation my husband felt for himself and his dad. My mother-in-law and I were beside ourselves with the desire to know every detail. But for very different reasons we had to exclude ourselves from the first sighting.
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The Greeting
The hotel lobby was the stage for the first physical Greeting for father, son, and brother. However, they decided to adjourn to a local watering hole, had a beer and visited. Making small talk, and yet making a connection. That is what relationships are all about, a connection. Learning information about each other that most people who have known each other for a significant amount of time take for granted. In the early morning hours they decided to rest and all went to their respective resting areas and rested for a few hours.
Breakfast
Jerry Seinfeld: There is no such thing as “fun for the whole family.” we came very close if not making it a false statement when We all met for breakfast at a local restaurant. This is the first time Mr. Jones and My mother-in-law, Mr. Sir’s wife gets to meet along with me and the kids. The only one missing from this reunion Mr. Sir’s youngest daughter.
Sunday
My husband and I decided to join Mr. Jones and his wife at the church of their choosing. Since they plan to visit us often (they have already decided this) they intended to make this church, their church away from home. After church, we spent the day at my in-law’s house. Mr. Sir handed Mr.Jones a book with all of the genealogy of his family that had been done at some point in the past. We shared stories of our past. Dinner at Mr. Sir’s favorite restaurant, food, and good conversation can’t go wrong. The in-laws retire early in the evening. However, my husband and I stay and visit with Mr. Jones and his wife for a little while longer. While the kids play in the arcade area. If you could choose your family members I think he would have been chosen.
Summer Camping Plans
A summer camping trip is planned where everybody is planning on attending. Everybody, defined as Mr.Sir and wife, myself and family, sister-in-law and family, Mr. Jones, wife and 4 kids in their early adult years. Along with visits from several of Mr. Sir’s close living relatives. Had this camping trip been fully realized this outing would have been a miracle. However, as plans often go there is always something that goes awry. And something did go awry.
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Change in plans
Not everyone could make it. My husband had to work so he got limited time. Mr. Jones’s wife got an injury and had to visit the local ER. Although an unfortunate event, it did not dampen the fun of the weekend. On top of all that, the weather decided not to have our normal 90 plus degree weather. Instead, it was in the 70-degree range. Making our camping trip pleasant for those of us who are used to cool mountain air.
Fishing
Mr. Sir and Mr. Jones along with his youngest son (the only one of Mr.Jones’ 4 kids able to attend) and my son went and checked out Mr.Sir’s favorite fishing holes. The cooler air made it easier for Mr. Sir to enjoy Mr. Jones’s company and not tire so easily. Also to watch four of his grandkids get to know each other. This was fabulous and yet sad since we missed so much.
Family
Family isn’t about whose blood you have. It’s about who you care about.
Trey Parker and Matt Stone, South Park, Ike’s Wee Wee, 1998:
Although that quote is so true it is also very false as my husband and Mr.Jones can attest to. The pain of wanting to lay eyes on the father who played a role in creating you is almost unbearable. I would have to agree with Jane Austen in Persuasion, written in 1818. “Family connexions were always worth preserving, good company always worth seeking.” It is not lost on any of us, in this story I have shared with you how choices and time have played a role.
The moments that we have with friends and family, the chances that we have to make a big difference in the world or even to make a small difference to the ones we love, all those wonderful chances that life gives us, life also takes away. It can happen fast and a whole lot sooner than you think.
Larry Page, University of Michigan Commencement Address, 2009
One last quote that is so true and evidenced by those who have experienced stories as I have shared,
I think people that have a brother or sister don’t realize how lucky they are. Sure, they fight a lot, but to know that there’s always somebody there, somebody that’s family.
Trey Parker and Matt Stone, South Park, Cat Orgy, 1999
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Tagged Husband, Interview, Matt McWilliams, The Affiliate Guy, wife